On Complaining

One day in my life as a guest-lecturer for a  university, a young student approached me at the  end of our discussion.  "I don't like your teaching style," he said with a moue of dissatisfaction.  "I don't either," I said.  "Do you have any suggestions?"
You see, it is very easy to criticize.  But before you critique, do you have a suggestion to offer?  Take a proactive approach and highlight the benefits of your suggestion.

There are times in life when, instead of complaining, you do something about your complaints. -Rita Dove

Rewarding good behavior

Michael LeBeof describes the greatest management principle as: The things that get rewarded get done.

He goes on to describe 10 strategies for making this principle work:

1.   Reward solid solutions instead of quick fixes.

2.   Reward risk-taking instead of risk-avoiding.

3.   Reward applied creativity instead of mindless conformity.

4.   Reward decisive action instead of paralysis by analysis.

5.   Reward smart work instead of busy work.

6.   Reward simplification instead of needless complication.

7.   Reward quietly effective behavior instead of squeaking joints.

8.   Reward quality instead of fast work.

9.   Reward loyalty instead of turnover.

10.Reward working together instead of working against.

In my workshop I ask leaders to write down the good behaviors that they want to see among their team members.  These behaviors, once noticed, should be rewarded with praise.  Good behaviors can mean being punctual, offering help, and making suggestions, among other behaviors.

The idea is to catch your associates doing what is right and when they get appreciated or affirmed, they will repeat the good behavior.

On results and relationships

The mother asked her son, "Give me two good reasons why you should not go to school." The son answered, "One, all the students hate me. Two, all the teachers dislike me." The son asked his mom, "Give me two good reasons why I need to go to school." "One, you are 52 years old,"the mother replied. "Two, you are the Principal in the school."
 An effective leader focuses on two things: results and relationships.

Reframing our mistakes

“More talk, more mistakes. Less talk, less mistakes. No talk, no mistakes.” How many times have you heard people say this? An effective leader is not afraid of making mistakes. Nobody learns by playing it safe. Are you a risk taker?  An intelligent person learns from his or her mistakes.  A wise person learns from his or her own mistakes and at the same time learns from the mistakes of others.

If I failed on something I reframe the experience.  I do not see it as a mistake.  I see it as a lesson.

“Failure is our most important product.” -R.W. Johnson, Jr., former CEO, JOHNSON& JOHNSON

On defining a problem

One cannot get help from Alcoholics Anonymous unless he accepts that he is an alcoholic and has a problem. Admitting and defining a problem makes it 50% solved. The remainder requires action. Are there problems at home and in the office that has not been acted upon? Try creating a Mission-Possible Committee.

Aha moment

After 10 years of scrimping, a farmer was finally able to buy a piece of lot in Candaba. He raises chickens and sells them in the next town. During the rainy season, his farm is flooded. Franctically, he would find a location to put his chickens in a higher ground. One day his wife heard him complain on how tired he was relocating his chickens every time the water rises. "I don't know what to do anymore," the farmer moaned. His wife stoically replied, "replace them with ducks." What are your "aha" moments? How do you promote creativity at home, in school and in the workplace?

On helping

Instead of barking orders, try saying, “I need your help.” Everyone is willing to help if given the opportunity. Haven’t you noticed if you are new in town and you ask for directions people will stop and assist you? Helping people and doing good makes one happy.